GeologyRockssick of puerile adverts on here.
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John
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As I said Jenny - its not my
Mon, 04/08/2013 - 20:34As I said Jenny - its not my work. I scribbled it down years ago, but can't remember the source.
To be honest I was trying to post anything geological to get rid if these flaming adverts.
John
“Civilisation exists by geological consent, subject to change without notice.” - Will Durant
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sick of puerile adverts on here.
Submitted by John on Fri, 03/29/2013 - 06:14.Hello all,
Just taken a school field trip up to the north Somerset and Devon coast (and a bit inland in Brendon Hills and Exmoor) and come back to a dozen new gobbledegook adverts, so I thought I'd post something quaisi-geological to try and push these things out.
Its something I scribbled out presumably a long time ago, so I can't quote the source I'm afraid.
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James Bond has now retired and retrained as a geologist, but still does a little undercover work. ...........
Disguised as a geologist with the British Geological Survey, he now has a Licence to Dig. He roams the world, fighting off other collectors, wooing women and collecting specimens. From Subduction Zones to Mid Ocean Ridges no criminal is safe with this an on his tail.
His vehicle - a Mk .005 Land Rover is equipped with the latest corundum bumpers and streak-plate side panels. The knock-off hub caps reveal diamond saws for making thin sections on the move. The exhaust not only has a catalytic converter, but also doubles as a mass spectrometer. The ultra violet head-lights quickly pick out fluorescent minerals, whilst the tail lights are able to hinge allowing a deadly spray of HCl which will deter even the most calcareous of villains.
As part of his disguise his name has been changed, and both criminals and ladies tremble (hopefully for different reasons) when he utters the words - " My names is Hound, Rock Hound."
You can follow the exploits of our hero in a new series of books and films such as:-
On Her Majesties Geological Survey
Orefinger
For Your Lens Only
Mudraker
From Mantle With Love
Dr. Moho
Live and Let Fold
The Geologist Who Loved Me
Never Say Basalt Again
Octahedral
The Man With The Golden Hammer
You Only Map Twice
and more, while he battles with some awful characters and ne're-do-wells such as
Vitreous Lustre
Slaty Clevage
Rose Quartz
Arthur Rhombic
Tri Klinik
Axial Plain
You will find yourself on the edge of your map-board when he meets the most awful of them all -
Koldwet Tripp.
Tongue-in-cheek - John
PS Just remember it's your cracked friends who let the light in!
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John
“Civilisation exists by geological consent, subject to change without notice.” - Will Durant